The Subconscious Path to Healing: Inside Pathways Counseling KC with Laura Bonk

From Counselor to Founder

Laura Bonk didn’t expect her small practice to become a local favorite. When she first launched Pathways Counseling KC in Overland Park, Kansas, it was just her, a single office, and a big vision. Fast-forward to today: Pathways Counseling KC has grown into a team of three and was voted Kansas City’s #1 mental health service for 2025[1][2]. For Bonk, a licensed counselor-turned-founder, the accolade is an honor – and an affirmation of the unique approach she champions. “It was just me to start this practice,” she says, looking back on Pathways’ humble beginnings, “and at this point, there’s three team members now, and we’re continuing to grow”[1]. The community support that propelled Pathways to the top “was just… incredible!” Bonk exclaims, still a bit in shock at the recognition[1].

Bonk’s journey from therapist to founder began in the mid-2010s. “I’ve been in the field since 2015, 2014,” she notes[3]. In her early career, like many counselors, she practiced traditional talk therapy – the kind of counseling where clients vent about their week and receive empathy and validation. But Bonk soon realized that something was missing. Clients would come “week after week” and make some progress, “feeling better, but still not getting down to the root of what’s causing the… issues in their life”[4][5]. She saw too many people stuck managing symptoms rather than truly healing. “I continued to see people… making some progress… but still not getting down to the root,” she recalls[4]. This realization lit a fire in her: there had to be a better way.

Through additional training – and her own personal journey in therapy – Bonk discovered that true recovery required deeper work. In fact, it was her experience as a client in counseling that proved transformative. “Most counselors do end up in counseling at some point… which I think is important,” Bonk says wryly[6][7]. She sought help for her own struggles, but found that “I was… not really getting results”[8] with talk therapy alone. So she became a bit of a self-experimenter, exploring alternative modalities on her own. Different modalities and trauma-informed techniques crossed her path, and Bonk “started learning about [them] and just using [them] in my own life, on my own”[9]. The effect was life-changing: “I really, really experienced… results from that,” she says of the moment things finally clicked[10][11].

Invigorated by this breakthrough, Bonk felt called to bring the same kind of deep healing to others. In 2019, she founded Pathways Counseling KC on one big idea: real, lasting change has to happen at the subconscious level[12][13]. “That’s the foundation,” Bonk explains – “I want people to actually get better, and not just come back and talk week to week without really seeing any results”[14]. She set out to build a practice that goes beyond surface-level coping and targets the root causes of pain. What began as a one-woman venture driven by passion and insight is now a growing team serving individuals, couples, teens, and families across Kansas and Missouri (both in-person and online)[15]. From trauma and attachment wounds to anxiety, depression, and relationship struggles, Pathways welcomes clients who feel stuck and are searching for a way forward. Bonk’s mission: to help them find their best path forward, for good.

Healing at the Subconscious Level

Walking into Pathways Counseling KC, clients quickly learn this isn’t your typical talk-therapy experience. Bonk’s philosophy is clear from the start: “true and lasting change needs to take place at the subconscious level. Anything else is simply putting a band-aid on a wound”[16]. In practice, that means sessions delve beneath daily hassles to the deeper why. Bonk often asks clients to reflect on triggering situations: Why did that bother you so much? What’s going on beneath the surface? Two people might live through the same event and react completely differently. The difference, Bonk explains, comes down to the subconscious meanings we assign to our experiences. Over time, difficult experiences instill powerful core beliefs – “core wounds that live in the subconscious mind” – such as “I’m unsafe,” “I’m not good enough,” or “I’m going to be abandoned”[17][18]. We may not even realize these beliefs are there, but “we live life sort of on autopilot” through these filters[17]. When something happens that triggers those buried beliefs, our reactions flare up in ways that might puzzle us on the surface.

That’s why traditional talk therapy alone wasn’t enough, in Bonk’s view. Simply recounting the week’s events and getting sympathy – while helpful in its own way – doesn’t uproot those hidden beliefs. “There is a space for [talk and validation]. It’s just… we need to go to the next level,” Bonk says[19][20]. At Pathways, she guides people to make connections between their present feelings and those deeper narratives formed long ago. Her counseling style involves gently peeling back the layers: When X happened, what did you make it mean about you? Often, the answer reveals a painful belief – “I’m not worth love,” “I’ll be rejected,” etc. – which

then drives behaviors like anxiety, withdrawal, or people-pleasing[21][22]. By bringing those unconscious scripts into the light, Bonk helps clients rewrite them. The goal is to heal at the level of the subconscious, not just cope consciously. “The modalities that we use focus on… bringing attention to that subconscious piece and then actually healing it there,” Bonk emphasizes, “instead of just talking about the story over and over again”[23].

So what does healing at the subconscious level look like in practice? It means combining insight with experiential techniques that engage the deeper brain and body. Bonk uses an integrative trauma-informed approach to get there. At Pathways, therapy is not one-size-fits-all; sessions are tailored to each individual’s needs[24][25]. Integrated Attachment Theory (IAT) underpins much of the work, recognizing how early relationships shape our internal beliefs about self and others[26]. Bonk and her team also draw from Internal Family Systems (IFS) – which helps clients resolve inner conflicts and wounded “parts” of themselves – as well as techniques like CBT and DBT when appropriate[26]. But trauma-focused modalities take center stage. One of Bonk’s go-to tools is EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), a specialized therapy for processing trauma and disturbing memories[25]. EMDR might sound mysterious to the uninitiated, but it’s highly effective at helping the brain reprocess painful experiences. In Bonk’s hands, EMDR is often used to calm the nervous system and revisit traumatic memories in a safe, controlled way. For example, when someone comes in with intense emotions and a dysregulated state, Bonk will first work on soothing their body’s fight-or-flight response. “When people come in and their emotions are all over the place, their nervous system is dysregulated, we work on regulating the nervous system, and EMDR is a really great tool for that,” she notes[27]. In addition, Bonk incorporates somatic and polyvagal principles – essentially, body-based and nervous-system-focused techniques – to help clients regain a sense of safety in their bodies. This might involve breathwork, mindfulness, or exercises to re-ground the client when trauma responses flare up. By blending these approaches, Pathways Counseling KC meets clients on multiple levels: mind, body, and heart.

A Safe Path Forward

Perhaps the most crucial ingredient in Bonk’s therapeutic approach isn’t a technique at all – it’s the sense of safety and trust she cultivates from day one. Bonk understands that seeking help can be intimidating. “Therapy’s hard… and it’s scary,” she acknowledges openly[28][29]. Walking into a counselor’s office – or even logging on to a telehealth session – means opening up to a stranger about your deepest pain, which is no small act of courage. That’s why Bonk and her team never rush the process. “We focus on creating a very safe space initially where we just listen,” she says, describing the gentle pace of early sessions[30]. “We don’t dive in, right away, into all of the EMDR and deeper stuff,” Bonk adds – first comes building a relationship where the client “feel[s] seen and understood, and valued”[31]. In those first few meetings, Pathways’ priority is to help the person feel comfortable and respected. Bonk makes a point to tell every new client how much she admires them for simply taking this step. “I always start out sessions with saying how much I respect people for going on this journey, because it’s so hard,” she shares[32][33]. Normalizing those nerves is key: “If someone’s nervous, it’s so normal – I get it. I’ve been there, too,” Bonk says reassuringly[33]. Her empathy is hard-earned; recalling her own early counseling experiences, she has been in that chair, feeling anxious and vulnerable. That personal understanding helps Bonk meet clients with deep empathy.

One young woman’s story shows just how powerful this safe, patient approach can be. Bonk remembers a client who came to Pathways after a lifetime of feeling misunderstood. “Her entire life [she] felt just completely misunderstood,” Bonk recalls, and at the core of it all was a painful belief: “I’m defective, and there’s something wrong with me”[34]. Carrying that shame, the woman was “so, so scared” to start therapy – “very quiet in the beginning, [a] very kind, sweet person” who doubted whether she even deserved to feel better[35]. Bonk

recognized the profound self-doubt and shame weighing on this client. Rather than push her to talk or confront trauma immediately, Bonk gave her the space to simply be heard. Session by session, trust grew. Bonk listened to her story without judgment and consistently reinforced that her feelings were valid. “The first few sessions, it’s about really helping people feel comfortable… that their story matters, and that there’s nothing wrong with them for feeling what they’re feeling”[36][37], Bonk explains. Only once that foundation of safety was laid did they begin the deeper work – gently challenging that “defective” label the client had worn for so long. In time, the young woman began to shed her shame and find her voice. She learned, with Bonk’s guidance, to replace “I’m defective” with a more compassionate truth: that she had been hurt in the past, but those wounds can heal and they do not define her worth. It was a transformation born not of any quick fix, but of feeling truly safe, seen, and supported.

Stories like these highlight why Bonk built Pathways in the first place. Progress isn’t measured just by fewer panic attacks or improved mood (though those happen too); it’s in a client reclaiming their identity and self-worth. Bonk treasures witnessing someone go from barely speaking above a whisper to confidently setting boundaries and pursuing what brings them joy. “It’s a terrible feeling to feel so isolated and alone and not know where to start,” she says, remembering how that young woman – and many others – felt before finding help[38]. Pathways exists to make sure no one has to navigate that journey alone. “You are not alone,” Bonk emphasizes to every new client – a message she and her team reinforce in both word and deed[39].

Healing from Narcissistic Abuse, Together

Among Pathways’ specialties, one stands out both for its prevalence and for Bonk’s personal connection: narcissistic abuse recovery. In recent years, narcissistic abuse – a form of emotional abuse perpetrated by someone with narcissistic traits, often involving gaslighting, manipulation, and erosion of the victim’s self-esteem – has become a hot topic. It’s also deeply misunderstood and frequently overlooked. Bonk is determined to change that. “Narcissistic abuse recovery is something that, again, hits me personally,” she reveals[40]. In her own life, Bonk endured experiences of narcissistic abuse that left her second-guessing herself and feeling “crazy.” During her healing journey, finally putting a name to what she’d been through was revelatory: “I was like, oh, this is narcissistic abuse, and… I’m not crazy, and this is why I do the things that I do”[41]. Understanding the abusive patterns lifted a huge weight of self-blame. That “you’re not crazy” moment was so powerful that it became a cornerstone of how Bonk now approaches survivors.

“It was during that time in my life where I was like, oh, this is narcissistic abuse… I’m not crazy,” Bonk says, and the relief in her voice is still palpable[41]. Today, she wants to offer that same relief and validation to others who might be suffering in silence. In fact, Bonk’s own experience is one reason she specialized in narcissistic abuse recovery – as she notes, many counselors end up focusing on issues that have personally impacted them[42]. At Pathways, she has created a niche in helping clients recover from relationships with narcissistic partners or family members. This includes educating clients about narcissistic behavior patterns and their psychological effects. Bonk even provides free tools on her website, like a “Narcissistic Family Role Quiz,” to help people identify unhealthy family dynamics[43][44]. The message throughout: If you feel something is deeply wrong in your relationship and you’ve been told it’s “all in your head” – you’re not alone, and you’re not crazy.

To further support these survivors, Pathways Counseling KC offers community-oriented groups. “We do run a group, about twice a year right now – an 8-week group for narcissistic abuse survivors,” Bonk shares[45]. In these small group settings, people with similar experiences come together to share, learn, and heal collectively. Recovery from narcissistic abuse can be an isolating road – abusers often cut their victims off from support, and survivors may feel nobody else could understand. Bonk’s response is to foster connection as an antidote to that isolation. The group provides a safe forum to swap stories and coping strategies, guided by a therapist who ensures the space remains validating and focused on growth. Participants often find enormous solace in realizing they are not alone in what they went through.

Bonk is also an advocate for speaking up about narcissistic abuse, despite the gaslighting that so many survivors have faced. “Anyone who’s listening and is like, I feel crazy. And I’m scared to tell anyone, because they’re gonna think I’m crazy… please tell someone – you’re not crazy,” Bonk urges passionately[46]. Secrecy and self-doubt only enable the abuse to continue[47]. By contrast, reaching out – whether to a counselor, a support group, or a trusted friend – is often the first step to breaking free. Bonk’s emphasis on this point is one part professional advice and one part personal plea; she remembers how transformative it was when she finally confided in someone and got the validation that the abuse was real and undeserved. In Pathways’ support group and upcoming programs, Bonk is making sure survivors have somewhere to turn and a community that “gets it.” Healing from narcissistic abuse, in her approach, is as much about regaining trust in yourself as it is about understanding the abuser’s pathology. With education, therapy, and peer support, survivors can rebuild their sense of reality and self. “We’re always going to maintain that focus on narcissistic abuse,” Bonk says – it’s a commitment woven into Pathways’ identity[45].

Pathways of Growth: Healing Beyond the Office

Even as Pathways Counseling KC thrives in the therapy room, Bonk has set her sights on reaching people outside of traditional sessions. Her newest venture, currently in the works, is an online learning platform aptly named Pathways of Growth. “We’re in the process of launching an online learning platform,” Bonk announces, clearly excited for this next chapter[48]. Pathways of Growth will offer a series of online courses and resources for personal healing. “What it is, is we’re developing online courses that I lead,” she explains – the courses are pre-recorded, guided by Bonk, and users can “go through at their own pace”[49][50]. Each course will dive into a specific topic or set of skills. Bonk envisions “a variety of different courses,” and she’s already planning one devoted entirely to narcissistic abuse recovery[51][52] (no surprise, given her passion in that area). Other courses may cover trauma healing fundamentals, attachment and relationships, nervous system regulation techniques, and more.

The beauty of Pathways of Growth is its flexibility and reach. Not everyone is ready or able to sit down one-on-one with a therapist. Some might not have access to specialized counseling in their area, or they feel more comfortable learning privately at first. Bonk’s online platform will be an alternative gateway to healing, especially for those who feel isolated. “This is going to be another avenue of reaching out to different people who… may not feel as comfortable coming into a one-on-one or doing something in person,” notes Kansas City

Thrive’s senior editor, Jeffrey, who applauds the initiative[53]. Bonk designed Pathways of Growth to be interactive and community-oriented, even in a virtual format. Learners will be able to ask questions of Bonk and her team as they progress through the material[54]. There will also be a community forum built into the platform, where participants can connect with others “going through a similar time in life” or who are “passionate about the same things”[55]. In short, it’s not just an online course – it’s a supportive network. Bonk hopes this forum will “help reduce the isolation” that people often feel when struggling with trauma or abuse[55].

Though Pathways of Growth is still in development, the launch is on the horizon. Visitors to the Pathways Counseling KC website can already find a Pathways of Growth tab and sign up to be notified as soon as the platform goes live[56]. “If you go to the page… there’s a way to sign up to be notified when the platform actually launches,” Bonk points out[56]. Early adopters will likely get first access to courses as they roll out. For Bonk, this project is all about making healing resources more accessible. Whether it’s a young professional hesitant to seek therapy, a busy parent needing tools on their own schedule, or someone anywhere in the country looking for guidance, Pathways of Growth will extend a helping hand. It’s an ambitious extension of Pathways’ mission – one that Bonk balances alongside continuing to grow her in-person practice (“bringing on other therapists” and broadening their “umbrella of specializations” as demand increases[57]). As she juggles these roles of therapist, business owner, and now content creator, Bonk remains grounded in her purpose: to guide as many people as possible toward real healing and growth. “That’s what’s next,” she says of the platform launch, “aside from just continuing to grow” in every other way[57].

Getting Started on Your Path

If Laura Bonk’s story resonates with you, you might be wondering how to take your first step. New clients can easily get started with Pathways Counseling KC by visiting their website and reaching out. “Anyone who wants to get in touch, I would say start out with going to our website – it’s PathwaysCounselingKC.com,” Bonk advises[58]. The site is full of information, from details about services and specialties to free resources like the attachment style quiz and narcissistic family role quiz. When you’re ready to reach out, the Contact page features a simple form. “All of our contact information is there… There’s a contact page, and when you submit that contact form, it goes directly to me,” Bonk explains[59]. In other words, your message won’t vanish into a bureaucratic void – Bonk personally receives and reviews each inquiry. After you send a note, she or a team member will follow up to schedule a consultation and figure out the next steps. “We go through a process of figuring out, like, okay, what are you needing? How can we help you? Who might be the best fit for you?”[60] Bonk says. This ensures that if you decide to start individual counseling, you’ll be paired with the therapist (whether Laura herself or one of her colleagues) best suited to your needs and personality.

Pathways also offers therapy groups periodically, as mentioned, and those interested can find the current group schedule on the website[61]. Group therapy can be a powerful option for those seeking a sense of community in healing – for example, the narcissistic abuse survivor group that Pathways runs twice a year. Information on upcoming groups, topics, and how to join is kept up-to-date online, so you can see if there’s a group that speaks to you. And for those eager to engage with the forthcoming online courses, the website’s Courses and Memberships section allows you to sign up for updates on Pathways of Growth[62]. With a quick sign-up, you’ll be notified the moment the new platform launches and be among the first to access Bonk’s on-demand healing programs.

No matter how you begin – be it a one-on-one session, a group meeting, or an online course – the invitation is open. “Those are good ways to get started,” Bonk says. The most important thing she wants people to know is that help is available. “We’re here, you’re not alone, we want to help however we can,” she emphasizes[39]. That genuine compassion is evident in her voice. Bonk understands the fear and loneliness that often precede seeking therapy. It’s why she built Pathways in the first place – to make sure no one has to stay stuck in pain or trauma without support. In her words, “It’s a terrible feeling to feel so isolated and not know where to start, and we really want to help people with that”[39]. Sometimes, the hardest part is just reaching out; Pathways Counseling KC strives to make that step as welcoming and straightforward as possible.

Healing Kansas City from the Inside Out

As our conversation winds down, it’s clear that Laura Bonk’s work is about much more than managing mental health symptoms – it’s about empowering people to reclaim their lives. Bonk’s approach is rooted in her own lived experience and a deep belief in community care. She has walked through darkness herself and emerged with hard-won wisdom, which she now uses to light the way for others. This melding of personal journey and professional expertise gives Pathways Counseling KC a special kind of heart. Clients sense it in the way Bonk truly hears their stories and validates their pain, no matter how “crazy” or broken they might feel when they first arrive. In a field sometimes criticized for clinical detachment, Bonk offers warmth and humanity. Her trauma-informed, empathy-first philosophy shows what’s possible when a healer is willing to be vulnerable too. “Counselors are just human, too, and experience their own stuff,” Bonk notes, reflecting on how her struggles made her a better therapist: going through her own healing “has really helped me be able to connect with people… and [understand] how frustrating it is to not be able to live the life that they actually want”[63][64]. That insight – that trauma is personal, and recovery is a courageous act – permeates every aspect of Pathways.

In Kansas City’s growing mental health landscape, Bonk and her team are carving out a space where genuine healing happens from the inside out. It’s fitting that Kansas City Thrive has shone a spotlight on Pathways Counseling KC – Bonk exemplifies the kind of community-rooted care that helps a city not only survive, but truly thrive. When individuals heal, relationships strengthen, families grow healthier, and the ripple effects extend to the community. Bonk often quotes trauma expert Dr. Gabor Maté, who said, “Trauma is not what happens to you, it’s what happens inside you as a result of what happened to you.” At Pathways, this wisdom is woven into practice: by healing what’s “inside you,” Bonk is helping Kansas Citians transform their lives from the inside out. And as her clients build the lives and relationships they’ve always wanted, they’re also proving something profound: with the right support, even the deepest wounds can lead to growth.

If you or someone you love is feeling stuck in old patterns, wrestling with anxiety or depression, or trying to heal from painful relationships, Pathways Counseling KC offers a hopeful path forward. Laura Bonk’s journey from counselee to counselor to founder is a testament to the power of turning pain into purpose. In her warm, capable hands, therapy becomes more than treatment – it becomes a shared journey toward wholeness. And in the heart of America’s Midwest, one woman’s dedication to subconscious healing and community care is quietly helping to heal a city, one story at a time. “You’re not alone,” Bonk reminds us – a simple truth that just might light the way to lasting change[39].

[1] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [27] [28] [29] [30] [31] [32] [33] [34] [35] [36] [37] [38] [39] [40] [41] [42] [43] [45] [46] [47] [48] [49] [50] [51] [52] [53] [54] [55] [56] [57] [58] [59] [60] [61] [62] [63] [64] Audio Podcast Kansas City Thrive

[2] [16] [44] Therapy at Pathways Counseling KC - Find Your Path Today

https://pathwayscounselingkc.com/

[24] [25] [26] Counselors - Meet Laura with Pathways Counseling KC

https://pathwayscounselingkc.com/team/laurabonk/